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Be nice to your children. For they will be choosing your nursing home someday.

You can trust the government, just ask the Indians.

Geniuses are never understood in their own lifetimes.

We came, we saw, we drank beer.

Be back later...my dog ate my car keys....we are hitchhiking to the vet's office.

Me breaking the rules? No. I test their elasticity.

Work harder: People on welfare depend on you.

Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.

Women/Men are like public toilets, they are either taken or full of crap!

I'm only crazy when other people cant stand that I'm right.



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